在交往中找到自己

At the beginning of the book, the author said:
A deep, driving desire to learn, a vigorous determination to increase your ability to deal with people.
How to develop this urge?
By constantly reminding yourself how important these principles are to you.
Picture to yourself how their mastery will aid you in leading a richer, fuller, happier and more fulfilling life. Say to yourself over and over:” My popularity, my happiness and sense of worth depend to no small extend upon my skill in dealing with people.

You learn the skill of dealing with people not because of other people told you that you should do not, but you yourself have the urge to learn and know this is important to yourself.

The author also said Nothing will work in all cases-and nothing will work with all people. If you are satisfied with the results you are now getting, why change? If you are not satisfied, why not experiment?

Every person who is reading the book has the idea to get something or to improve something. The right way to do with this book is act according to the principles that you accept, for the rest, keep an attitude of neutrality, which also offers a different angle to look the world.

如果你对现在的状况满意的话，不需要改变，但是如果不满意的话，为什么不试试呢？虽然并不是每个方法都会有用，谁也没保证所有方法都有效。
作者一直强调，对这些原则，都要自己内心真正认同，才能去做。那些技巧只有是真诚发自内心才会有效。
如果内心里觉得这么做很虚伪，那就不要做。就算做里，结果也不会好的。
书中有Chapter 10
An appeal that everybody likes

a person usually has two reasons for doing a thing: one that sounds good and a real one
 Please do not publish that picture of me any more. My mother does’t like it.
写到为自己的一些行为找寻借口，虽然现实生活中太常见了，可是我还是无法接受这样。
那这一个原则，我就不会接受。

想到看这本书，肯定是希望得到些什么有用的东西。最重要的就是从心底认为，处理好人际关系对自己很重要。其实自己在人际关系上没有什么很好的经验，一切都是可以改善的，至于哪些会带来好的结果，哪些是错的，并没有实战经验。没有什么好失去的。
做个行动派吧！