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Qgoir 喜福会 的书评 发表时间:2010-01-07 23:01:52

Lost in significance ----a brief discussion on tra

The Joy Luck Club is Amy Tan’s debut to the world, and to be honest, this is the first time I finished an English novel. It drives me into a fancy world where I can find a dramatic China, coiling her body between the tradition and the modernity. Four pair of mothers and daughters being obedient or independent to the past and future, their stubbornness and the confusion between the two different cultures and their identities is quite touching.

Unfortunately, it seems that the world manifested by Cheng Naishan etc. is relatively different form the world Amy Tan created. I did not realize the problem until I picked up their translation text just for scanning, after the reading of the English version . The problem blooms so seriously that I am beginning to doubt the contemporary translation circumstance in China, combining other reading experiences I had before.

As the translation theories have developed rapidly since the 20th century, the source text is no longer unchangeable. Translators’ subjectivity is taken into consideration in common discussion, “equivalence” generally replaces “faithfulness” as the standard of translation, and “Catford’s linguistic theory of translation and Eugene Nida’s dynamic equivalence are the two most representative theories concerning “equivalence”. “Their theories on the one hand admit the status of the author and the original text, and on the other hand they also confront the personal involvement of translator in his or her work.”(陈燕敏,13) But how to keep balance between the authors’ authorities and translators’ freedom is not an immediately solvable question concerning both translation theorists and translators.

I chose Part 1, chapter 2 AN-MEI HSU: Scar and Part 2, chapter 7 ROSE HSU JORDAN: Half and Half (mainly because these two chapters constitute half of one mother-daughter story: AN-MEI HSU and ROSE HSU JORDAN’ story) to show the pessimistic statistics. 53 phrases and sentences are not completely translated into Chinese, including 2 entire paragraphs deleted ; 57 Paraphrases, 33 alterations with less changing of meaning while 20 “modifications” with sharp changing in significance and 4 changes in sentence patterns; 12 creations, which the author actually does not mention at all.

1. The Missing Organs.
The missing tissues can be easily fond throughout the whole book, some are acceptable:

ST :Mrs. Jordan also had a few words to say. Ted had casually invited me to a family picnic, the annual clan reunion held by the polo fields in Golden Gate Park. (Tan, Amy, 117, emphasis added)
 
Cheng’s translation: 同时,特德的母亲乔顿太太那边,对此也有一番话了。那天,特德偶尔发兴,请我去金门公园参加一个他们家族一年一度的家庭野餐。(程乃珊,100)

This sentence is taken from ROSE HSU Jordan’s explanation on the attitude towards Rose and Ted’s relationship from Ted’s mother. Here the “clan reunion” and “by the polo field” is not stated in the Chinese translation, but it has less effort on purport expression, thus this deletion is permissible.

But some are quite serious:

ST: My mother did not let her chin fall down. She walked back to the beach and put the Bible down. She picked up the thermos and teacup and walked to the water’s edge. Then she told me that the night before she had reached back into her life, back when she was a girl in China, and this is what she had found.

“I remember a boy who lost his hand in a firecracker accident,” she said. “I saw the shreds of this boy’s arm, his tears, and then I heard his mother’s claim that he would grow back another hand, better than the last. This mother said she would pay back an ancestral debt ten times over. She would use a water treatment to soothe the wrath of Chu Jung, the three-eyed god of fire. And true enough the next week this boy was riding a bicycle, both hands steering a straight course past my astonished eyes!”

And then my mother became very quiet. She spoke again in a thoughtful, respectful manner.

“An ancestor of ours once stole water from a sacred well. Now the water is trying to steal back. We must sweeten the temper of the Coiling Dragon who lives in the sea. And then we must make him loosen his coils from Bing by giving him another treasure he can hide.”

My mother poured out tea sweetened with sugar into the teacup, and threw this into the sea. And then she opened her fist. In her palm was a ring of watery blue sapphire, a gift from her mother, who had died many years before. This ring, she told me drew coveting stares from women and made them inattentive to the children they guarded so jealously. This would make the Coiling Dragon forgetful of Bing. She threw the ring into the water. (Tan, 128~129, emphasis added)

Cheng’s translation: 妈并不泄气,她回到沙滩上,拎起热水瓶和茶杯,来到大海边上。事后,当她恢复过来后,曾跟我说过,从前在中国时,人们都用这方法来祭海,以平息龙王的怒气。而这通常是很有效的。

此刻,妈把茶倒入杯中,加了白糖,再抹下手上一只蓝宝石戒,那是外婆留给她的遗物。如今外婆去世多年了。这枚戒指,母亲不止一次得意地对我说过,不知吸引过多少女人的羡慕和注意。现在,她把这枚戒指也献给龙王,希望龙王会放出平。她把戒指扔入海里。(程乃珊, 110, emphasis added)

This short passage is taken from ROSE HSU JORDAN‘s memory on AN-MEI HSU’s effort to get her son, Bing back from drowning in the sea. Obviously the translators rewrite the plot here, completely delete the story which AN-MEI told her daughter and the prayer she said before the symbolic ceremony. All the legends and stories told by the mothers in the frame tales create a mysterious and unfamiliar scene of China for Chinese readers, offering ways to know how the author understands and interprets her native culture and to glimpse what the image of China it is in the eyes’ of Chinese Americans. The stories may be too eccentric to be translated, but the abridgement diminishes the sentimental expression and reduced the vivid story to a quite pale narrative.

2. The Pathological Blood Vessels

The pathological blood vessels are most common problems in the translation text, due to the abuse of free translation. The method of paraphrase does help the local readers comprehend foreign text better, but sometimes it will lead to transformations of significance:
ST: “An-mei,” she (Popo) murmured, now more gently. “Your dying clothes are very plain. They are not fancy, because you are still a child. If you die, you will have a short life and you will still owe your family a debt. Your funeral will be very small. Our mourning time for you will be very short.” (Tan, 47, emphasis added)

Cheng’s translation: “安梅,”这下,她(婆婆)的语气温柔一点了。“你的寿衣很素净,一点不鲜艳,因为,你还只是个孩子,即便你的寿数短了点了,你还是亏欠了养育你的长辈,因此,你的丧事也将是简单的。我们会很快把你忘掉的。”(程乃珊, 34, emphasis added)

This is from AN-MEI HSU’s childhood memory when she is dying. Cheng comprehends Popo’s words “Our mourning time for you will be very short.” as “we will forget you soon (我们会很快把你忘掉的).” This might be a way of interpreting, but “mourning time” can also represent the special period that Chinese people mourn for the defunct family members, usually will be seven days or forty-nine days, even three years for parents in ancient China. A short mourning time, as Popo explained in the text, is because kids owed family a debt when they died young. It is a common tradition that the funeral for seniority is more magnificent than funeral for children in China; whereas “We will forget you soon” lose all the information above and simply bring an extra emotional influence that AN-MEI’s relatives in Ningpo are unconcerned with her, she is not even worth a usual mourning time, thus a more negative portrait for Popo is furbished.

Another paraphrase case, which is related to rhetoric:

ST: “Ted, if you want me to go, I’ll go.” (Said Rose)
And it was as if something snapped in him (referred Ted). “How the hell did we ever get married? Did you just say ‘I do’ because the minister said ‘repeat after me’? What would you have done with your life if I had never married you? Did it ever occur to you?”
This was such a big leap in logic, between what I said and what he said, that I thought we were like two people standing apart on separate mountain peaks, recklessly leaning forward to throw stones at one another, unaware of the dangerous chasm that separated us.

But now I realize that Ted knew what he was saying all long. He wanted to show me the rift. Because later that evening he called from Los Angeles and said he wanted a divorce. (Tan, 120, emphasis added)

Cheng’s translation: “特德,如果你要我去,我就去。”
他好像被火烙了,暴跳如雷地对我吼道:“真见鬼,我们到底怎么会结婚的!在婚礼上,瞧你一本正经地跟着牧师:我会做个好妻子,我会与你共患难……统统见鬼去吧,你只不过是跟着牧师在鹦鹉学舌。如果我不娶你,你将怎么过?也是这样不肯作任何决定,不肯承担一点责任吗?”

从逻辑上来说,是我们各自的所作所为,导致了我们间感情的恶化,那简直是个一百八十度的大突变。我俩就像分别站在两个山头上互扔石头的家伙,肆意的攻击,最终导致了这场婚姻的破裂。
然而现在我意识到了,在特德,他是早有准备的,或者说,早有此居心了。他这是故意在制造事端。因为自那晚不久,他就从洛杉矶打电话过来,正式向我提出离婚。(程乃珊, 102~103, emphasis added)

This part is taken from ROSE HSU JORDAN’s narration on the quarrel between Ted and her, starting from Ted’s querying if Rose wanted to come along with him to Los Angeles for a dermatology course. What the narrator (Rose) mentioned here “This was such a big leap in logic” is referred to “between what I said and what he said”, because just before Ted‘s roaring they were talking about Rose’s decision on going or not, a casual topic at home but suddenly Ted started to roar about how did they get married; while the “big leap” in translation text is point to “our behaviors lead to the crash of relationship”. The denotation of the words has been switched.

The simile which narrator used to describe the broken relationship shrink to something not so pathetic in the translation: “unaware of the dangerous chasm that separated us.” is translated into “finally lead to the divorce (最终导致了这场婚姻的破裂。)”. “The dangerous chasm” implies that the marriage is in danger, but expressing it as a declaration causes it to lose so much poetic imagination and sentiment within the expressions. The reason to make this change in rhetoric seems unreasonable and doubtable, since from my point of view, it is beyond the essentials.

And two instances of sentence pattern transformation:
ST 1: And when I say that it is certainly true, that our marriage is over, I know what else she will say: “Then you must save it.” (Tan, 116, emphasis added)

Cheng’s translation: 就算我向她一再明白表示,我和特德的婚姻已经过去了,她一定还会这样说:“一点也没法挽救了?”(程乃珊, 99, emphasis added)

ST 2:I see him standing by the wall, safe, calling to my father, who looks over his shoulder toward Bing. How glad I am that my father is going to watch him for a while! (Tan, 125, emphasis added)

Cheng’s translation: 我看见他背靠墙面站定,没任何危险的征兆。他在叫着爸爸。 爸爸回头答应着他。我很高兴爸能代我看管他一阵。(程乃珊, 107, emphasis added)

In the first case, instead of the original declarative sentence “Then you must save it.”, an interrogative sentence “It can not be saved at all? / You can not save it at all? (一点也没法挽救了?) ” takes position; While in the second case, the translators use a declarative sentence “I’ m glad that my father is going to watch him for a while. (我很高兴爸能代我看管他一阵。) ” to replace the exclamatory sentence “How glad I am that my father is going to watch him for a while!”. Generally speaking, various intimations and emotions can be touched though different sentence patterns, to translate the sentence patterns which author used to describe certain feelings is not that difficult to do, then why the translators choose to change them remains a query from the readers .

3. The Tumors.

The translators’ subjectivity continues functioning, besides cutting off and replacing, they create some brand-new expressions to demonstrate their abilities:

ST 1: After her prayer, her faith was so great that she saw him, three times, waving to her from just beyond the first wave. “Nale!” ----There! And she would stand straight as a sentinel, until three times her eyesight failed her and Bing turned into a dark spot of churning seaweed. (Tan, 128)

Cheng’s translation: 她的坚定不移的信念,竟令她在一片朦胧中三次见到平,在白花花的浪尖上向他挥手。“哪?呵,在那里!”她犹如一个尽责的哨兵,直挺挺地伫立着,目光力图穿透那片海与天之间,张挂着的触摸不着的白纱。但每次,平一出现,即隐去,我们只能看见黑黢黢地浮游着的海草丛。(程乃珊, 110, emphasis added)

ST 2: “He’s there,” she said firmly. She pointed to the jagged wall across the water. “I see him. He is in a cave, sitting on a little step above the water. He is hungry and a little cold, but he has learned now not to complain too much.” (Tan, 129)

Cheng’s translation: “他就在那里。”妈的双脚像两根大理石的石柱,牢牢地插定在沙滩上。几乎不是凭着意识,而是单凭着肌肉的力量,她一只手举着指定对面那片锯齿形的黑色剪影,海湾那边的围墙,固执地说,“我看见他了,他就在山洞里,坐在漫浸着水的石台阶上,又饿又冷。但他已老成多了,学会了忍耐。”(程乃珊, 111, emphasis added)

It seems that the beautiful sentences translators add on should not be blamed; it creates a more vivid scene and reinforces the charm of the plot. However, translation is not an activity of composing; translators should not over exaggerate while some small creating methods are acceptable.

After the author completes the book with the last drop of ink and sends it to the publisher, the work should be considered as a lively creature; nothing can be easily cut off or added on. However, the translation cannot be done only though literal translating, multiple strategies and methods such as free translating, proper deletion and some appropriate transformations do perfect the translation text and make it easier for readers to understand. As Cheng Naishan states in the postscript of the 2006 version: “both literal translation and paraphrase strategies are adopted in order to cater for Chinese readers’ habits and preserve the jocoseness and American humor in the original text. This version has deleted some explanations which aim to help foreign readers who don’t know Chinese traditions too much. (为了照顾中国读者的阅读习惯,尽量保留原作的诙谐和美国式的幽默,在翻译过程中,直译与意译相结合;这个版本删除了一些作者原为照顾不了解中国习俗的外国读者而作的一些注释)” (程乃珊, 260) But if this is the case, the Chinese culture in author’s mind will be blurred and the world author created will be distorted, compare to the original text.

Since the translator’s subjectivity involves a large number of factors, as Meng Xiaoqing puts, “the translator’s ideology, thinking patterns, aesthetic-orientation, empathy, and personal experiences and so on. It is related to circumstances more individual in nature such as one’s origin, race, education, gender, age, social class, sexual orientation, political convictions, moral values, religious beliefs, personal experiences, relationships and interests, all factors contributing to the positional of the translator” (Meng Xiaoqing, 22),responsible translators should be prudent to use the strategies and methods (especially when translating the foreign books into native language.) for assuring the original meaning and tastes.




References
Graham, D. Edward. “Unquiet on the Western Front: The ‘Orientalism’ of Contemporary Chinese-American Women Writers.” Oriental Prospects: Western Literature and the Lure of the East. Ed. C.C. Barfoot and Theo d' Haen. Havard: Rodopi B.V.Editions, 1998
Meng, Xiangqi. Translator, subjectivity and Translation Norms. Beijing: Beijing Language and Culture University, 2004.
Schell, Orville. “Your Mother Is in Your Bones.” New York Times 19 March, 1989.
Tan, Amy. The Joy Luck Club. New York: Penguin Books, 2006.
陈燕敏. Back Translation and Reproduction of Author’s Style in Chinese American Literature----A Case Study of Joy Luck Club. 上海:上海外国语大学学位论文库,2009.
谭恩美. 程乃珊、贺培华、严映薇(译).《喜福会》. 上海:上海译文出版社,2006.
肖薇.《異質文化語境下的女性書寫——海外華人女性寫作比較研究》. 成都:四川出版集團巴蜀書社,2005.

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