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2016-07-14

Once upon a time, an author came across a negative comment on Amazon underneath the name of his book. It was a glaring eyesore staring at him, and he couldn’t get over it. Pondering over the comment for a while, he decided to track down the commenter who turn out to be several states away. He crossed the states and tracked him down, only ended up breaking his head with an empty beer bottle.

Okay, this case might be a little extreme. But somehow I could oddly resonate with the author, and at some point in my life, I shared a similar mentality with him. I was emotionally vulnerable to the negative comments on my work. I once lost sleep after receiving harsh comments on me being a bad writer, and the worst thing is, I doubted my ability in doing what I care the most.

Therefore, when I bump into a podcast interview with Jia Jiang on Jeff Goins’ Portfolio Life(highly recommend btw), his description on the personal project subverted my view on rejection. For those who haven’t read his book, Jia is an entrepreneur who decided to toughen himself up through “100 days of rejection” – seeking one rejection every day from strangers for consecutive 100 days, as a form of therapy. As someone who has spent quite amount of time seeking validation, and avoiding the dreadful denial, I lived to believe that “rejection is a form of guidance”. I set up realistic goals, avoid those I couldn't reach in the name of “knowing myself well”. For me, reading this book and watching Jia’s 100 Days of Rejection Videos, or “Rejection Therapy” as he put it, was an emotional roller coaster. I was intrigued at first,and it turned into bouts of adrenaline rush watching him being rejected, then it started to grow on me. Jia apparently knew himself well enough, but his willingness to take the rejection from strangers also shows that he is someone who wants to be responsible for his dream, talent and ambition, instead of settling for security and stability. “The only thing I dread [is] not to be worthy of my sufferings.” He stated in his book.

“Rejection Therapy” is similar to the concept of “Exposure Therapy”. The book explained from a biological perspective that being afraid of rejection is human, but by exposing yourself into an intense series of rejections in a short period of time, you turn rejection into "a piece of muscle”, once you embrace it, “you get into a momentum”. The simple concept is to experience enough rejection till it’s no longer an obstacle for action. But the biggest difference that set this book apart from all the cliché is the analysis and reasoning behind each and every experiment. After each rejection, the author put the negative comments, the rejections and denials under the microscope, and that's when it all started to kick in. As a reader, I watched his videos for the thrill of seeing the daredevil, read his book out of curiosity of what his mentality is, but it is his struggle in his words and his logic in his analysis that really convinced me the meaning behind his process.

Then there is the story telling. From a writer’s perspective, not only is Jia a daring entrepreneur, but a good story teller. As if his own stories weren’t enough, he gave great examples of other people’s stories in the right timing, which supported strongly his analysis, and they are enjoyable to read. I especially enjoyed reading the story of Louis CK, whose obsession with becoming nothing but a comedian was so adamant that he never flinched from the rejections, till he reaches that unparalleled success. If he regards rejection as “a form of guidance” like I used to, the comedy world would lose a rare talent.

Personally, the book has precipitated me into a few actions for the past 3 weeks. At several critical moments, I tried to put myself into Jia’s shoes, thinking about what I would do if I weren’t afraid. I am not going to knock on strangers’ door as the author did to be braver, but the book did provide a different perspective to alter my believe system. I started to take other’s negative comments less seriously, and focus more on my own. Also, I’m surprised how few comments the book has on douban, and why it didn’t have a Chinese version for more people to read? So far, I’ve tirelessly recommended this book and Jia’s videos to a bunch of friends, and they all loved it. Hopefully, it could also bring some change to your life.

Here are the links to his website and YouTube videos:

http://fearbuster.com/
https://www.youtube.com/user/DukieAjah

"He who is not busy being born is busy dying.&

2015-04-06

Money makes money. "For whoever has will be given more, and they will have an abundance. Whoever does not have, even what they have will be taken from them."
　　
Peter Thiel set the tone of the book from the very beginning, he makes money and he is one of the less than 20% who owns the 80% wealth, yet he seems humble and genuine in talking about the his analytic skills on creating and founding startups.
　　
To create a successful startup and build a bright future, you need to step down a notch, or several notches, including stop making grand vision, being flexible, avoiding competitions, hiring the right people, don't take sales for granted, etc. He offers some interesting tips like don't invest in the tech companies where CEOs wear suit and tie and a good startup is slightly similar to a cult.
　　
Here are some tips I found particularly valuable:
　　
1. Planning is more important than business itself.
Grand vision is not necessary and could be risky to the company, so we should always have a plan. Even bad plan is better than no plan at all. "Anyone who claims to be able to do something great is suspect, and anyone who wants to change the world should be more humble." One interesting example is about Gladwell. As a Gladwell fan, I relished reading his pattern of the analysis on reasons and chances behind historical events, and it's even more entertaining to see my favorite author being put under the microscope. "You can't understand Malcolm Gladwell without understanding his historical context as a Boomer(born in 1963)" He went on explaining how Gladwell made a career on his books: “Baby Boomers is a whole generation learned from childhood to overrate the power of chance and underrate the importance of planning. ”
　　
2.Don't try to break into a competitive market.
It is quite obvious why, but ambitious entrepreneurs keep tripping on it. Or in another word, curelessly ambitious. “If you want to create and capture lasting value, don't build an undifferentiated commodity business,” as Thiel put it. Pessimists tend to think the market is saturated, whatever you’ve thought of or about to think of have already been created. But if you “really look into it”, you will find that nitch that will bloom into a monopoly.
　　
3. If you look hard enough, you'll discover the virgin area.
Not long before, a friend of mine shared with me a story she heard on a startup seminar. A banker found people in a small village near Beijing always purchasing motorbike on loans because they can't afford it but they need them for daily commute. They usually do it by taking small loans (around 5000 RMB) from loan shark and it takes a couple of years to clean the debt. The banker saw the opportunity behind the market and started a business to provide the village people small loans with the help of the Bank of Beijing. His business was successful and it also proves that if you try harder, you will see the virgin area, that's monopoly.
　　
4. Monopolists can afford to think about things other than making money; non-monopolists can’t. This idea is contradictory to the traditional concept that startups are usually the fearless ones to think up innovative ideas and try them out, while the monopolist are considered as laying back in their comfort zone and not bothering making any changes. After reading about Google’s 20% and 80% theory (engineers spend 80% of their time working on main tasks and 20% on their own projects), I come to a deeper understanding of the point. Startups cultivate novelty ideas cos they expect immediate profits. Whatever ideas pay back effectively is the correct one. On the other hand, the monopolists are the ones who can afford set aside enough capital for the ideas who might not bring the immediate dollar figures, but in the long run, will benefit the monopolists.
　　　　
5. The Power Law. Aka, would you rather be a big fish in a small pond or a small fish in a big pond. What’s the difference? It’s not about gaining confidence and feeling good about yourself. As a business man, Thiel refers to a more pragmatic matter—the $$$. You could have 100% of the equity if you fully fund your own venture, but if it fails you'll have 100% of nothing. Owning just 0.01% of Google, by contrast, is incredibly valuable (more than $35 million as of this writing). Therefore, it leads to a more talented people who’d rather work for a bigger companies with all the security and perks. For the startups, the question to ponder on is “why would someone join your company when he/she could work at a monopolist?”

6. Time is your most valuable asset, it's odd to spend it working with people who don’t envision any long-term future together. This I have to say has been one of the primary issues in my career path. When you found yourself out of place, you A. Suck it up and pretend to be one of them. B. Be the office loner, you got enough friends anyway. C. Quit and keep looking till you find your own crowd. I have been between B and C for most of my career and I wish I have an answer to the question by now, but the truth is… I may agree with Thiel theoretically, but I simply can’t afford “looking for other options.” Always be hopeful and give your personal best, as long as the team leader has the similar long-term future, you are all set till your next big thing.
　　
7. You are either on the bus or off the bus. Thiel said that everyone should be full time employee, otherwise they can’t play their accurate roles. This is the red flag I didn’t spot back to 2011 and 2012 when both the magazine and the startup online magazine I worked for hired interns and parttimers to finish the majority of the content. If the whole magazine is created by people who are not paid(enough), why did we expect it to be high-quality at all? Both companies deteriorated soon after.

8. Poor sales rather than bad product is the most common cause of failure. No matter how much we don’t want to admit it, it’s all about marketing and sales. In Chinese, there is an old saying “If the wine is good enough, it doesn’t matter how deep in the alley it was hidden.” Products have been spoken highly rather than the sales skill, however, according to Thiel, the good sales are hidden. The person who is persuasive and convincing is a good sales in nature, such as Tom Sawyer who managed to persuade his neighborhood friends to whitewash the fence for him-a masterful move.
　　　　
9. Why computers can’t replace human beings. Whether or not the computer will replace human being has been a constant discussion, and Thiel’s assumption gave us some solace. The doctors who’ve studied for years know how to combine the clinical understanding with an ability to communicate it to non-expert patients. Good teachers can tailor the instruction to different individuals. Computers might be better at collecting data and doing research, but it will never beat professionals in flexibility and further analysis.

10. Don't overestimate your own power as an individual. Steve Job’s stories, the Google Story, Facebook Founder stories, all of the bestsellers are trying to tell us that you need to be egocentric and weird to be the top business leader. While the rest of the world are trying to create mythological and relentless leader figures, Thiel believes “founders are important not because they are the only ones whose work has value, but rather because a great founder can bring out the best work from everybody at his company. ”

Last but not the least, I used Bob Dylan’s famous words as the ending: he who is not busy being born is busy dying. For I am now entering a new chapter of my life, facing much doubt about changing a career path from media to marketing in fashion retail, and planning on taking an academic journey for a master degree, I need the strength and power more than any time in my life.

a sneak peak of the author's style and who he

2013-07-08

My very first book by Malcolm Gladwell, and I will read a lot of him from now on. It was, generally speaking, a sneak peak of his style and who he is.

The biggest discovery I made pleasantly is that "you don't have to be an expert in anything in order to write about it". And I found it a great advice for my work. Needless to say, Gladwell writes well, and that's all it takes. While he didn't expose much of his point of view in his articles for New Yorker, his extended research and insightful approach was impressive. With lots of background filling and checking and checked with as many people involved as possible, he'd be able to write about different industries in the same manner- just like pilling off an onion. It was logical, informative and never boring for a second. Just like what's said on the cover: everything from criminology to ketchup, job interview to dog training, Malcolm Gladwell shows how the most ordinary subjects can illuminate the most extraordinary things about us and our world. I couldn't put in better myself.

While I didn't find every article appealing, most of them are insightful and educational to us. It was a magazine-like book pieced together by random work done by the writer, through which you can get a bit taste of everything. But of course, longer essay or article might showcase more of his skills and more like, a book.

Definitely intrigued by this book, in fact, I just placed an order earlier tonight on another one of his.

Can't wait.

Little Things Matter and Stay Focused

2014-02-08

Malcolm Gladwell is a genus. It doesn't mean he is necessarily high in IQ or knows how to tackle rocket science problems. He notices the things that people usually take for granted and pieces them together into nice theories that mean to be educational for many. Before reading this book, I erroneously took a peep at the comment on douban, and found someone calling him a fraud. I stopped reading the comment and kept on flipping through the book. And I am glad I did. While the Outliers gives a hang of his style and impress me with the author's meticulous research power, this one carry on all the strength with equally, if not stronger and more riveting evidence to back up his points of view. Many have already summon up the pith nicely, so instead, I will write about the reading experience and how it was thought provoking in a different way for me.

He clearly has his distinctive pattern in writing. Having read 3 of his 5 books, I found all of them concise and clear in logic and examples, and they don't jump around much. His writing procedure is almost transparent, first the structure is built up, then he fills them in with key measures, and backs the measures with stories. Even though every book is written with stories abound, they are layered in a logical way. For readers, it is certainly an enjoyable reading experience. I point the writing pattern out, because like many second language learners, I too face the problem of wring. More often than not, we want to be different, we don't want to be pinned down by a pattern and we want to avoid telling flat stories. In this case, Gladwell shows us it's not so much about the language or the style, it's about the amount of research and more importantly, the logic in unraveling them.

And then there are the stories in the book. His books are usually filled with stories that aren't far away from everyday life. In Outliers, Gladwell started the book with a story of his ancestors which might seem to be easily found for everyone through family vine, however, thinking about the process, not everyone knows where their great grandparents were and what they did then that relate to who we are and what we do. I've heard the story of how my parents meet a million times, and like many youngsters, we are inclined to blame our parents when encountered personal issues. However, if you put yourself into a bigger picture, things that happened 3 or 5 generations ago contributed to who you are now, it sound a lot more complex and profound. Back to The Tipping Point, there is a similar example Gladwell used in the book, the circle of 40 friends he had and how when it was boiled down into a single person Jacob who is an ultimate connector of all his friends, and to put it profoundly, responsible for his entire social life. It is the writer's duty to take the reader on a journey of his own thought. It is difficult cos many writers including great writers like Hawthorne or Shakespeare don't bent over backward to consider if anyone could 'get' what they write. And artists are known to 'live in their world', believe me, I've met a few who are unable to communicate like a normal person in a social context. However, people like Gladwell who puts a clear structure and actively provides thought provoking theories that are interesting and they are in the clear genre, and it doesn't hamper them to be bestsellers.

Besides patterns, I constantly found myself relating to the stories. The one story under the Stickiness Factor, the fear experiment to educate the students from Yale University to get the tetanus shot. The idea to make something stick follows a myth, there are people like Chip and Dan Heath who researched thoroughly on how some ideas stick and wrote the book 'Made to Stick', countless creative forth have made a career out of the industry, not to mention AMC's drama series Mad Men who have attracted viewers around the glob. Gladwell shows us that there is no magic to make an idea stick, and in his example, you need to make something relevant, put it close as it could be into your daily life. It reminds me of all the new year resolution that I routinely made, and how some of them inevitably failed but some of them stays for a long time and turn into lifelong habits. For example, if I vow to run more in new year, it would very unlikely to happen with my busy schedule, the traffic in my neighbourhood, the polluted air in my city, and there are a million things more fun to do than actually putting on my sneakers and exercise after a day of work. In this case, when we know the Stickiness Factors, we know better to make it work: set aside certain time in a day only for running, buy better gears, sign up a gym, set up a goal...the simple notion behind it: to make it relevant and put it into your schedule.

The Tipping Point is definitely a must read, and I can't wait to finish the rest of his books.

Not a Book Review

2014-04-15

For my favourite bio and failed attempt at organising a book club.

This book has been stashed away since my year as an invisible intern at an automobile company. A very nice girl Debbie discovered my interest in reading and passed me the then latest best seller. But given the hefty volume I never had the courage to flip through. Earlier this year, the very precious book club that I attend started to morph into a carousing event and some very talented people start to leave, which led to my quitting. Long story short, now I am no longer the beneficiary of the 'literary lovers' from the club who gave quite a few nice recommendations. I started to think about the book I always wanted to read but did, therefore, 4 years after my first encounter, I picked this one up. It was hefty for sure, but worth the time.

I have always respected Steve Jobs and his wisdom in design and as motivational speaker. I've been one of the lucky ones to have read/watched his 'Stay hungry, stay foolish' speech at an early age. Without fully comprehending the metaphor, I was determined not to settle and find 'the perfect job'. I changed my job for couple of times during the first 2 years of my career, through constantly questioning myself and tapping into my potential, as well as finding my true character I gradually gained the concept behind the definition.

And now it's time to get to know the genius who put the thoughts into my head in the first place. I have read pieces about him being quirky, and according to the outliers by Malcolm Gladwell, his success heavily banks on his upbringing, but maybe Walter Isaacson is even better at digging deep into the facts, the book pieces together a great bio and gives reasons on why he is the way he is and what becomes of him.

As I get to know him from childhood in Palo Alto, California, to Reed College Portland, Oregon, a clear picture of him started to unfold. Not only has he been the CEO of 2 most influential companies of the century Apple and Pixar, as known by most people, but his changing roles as an adopted son, a teen drop-out, an amorous lover, an advocate for sharp design, a weirdo with choose disability, a not so doting father, a husband and a cancer patient. Succeeded at an early age, he failed hard and bounced back. The book makes his life look like a roller coster. As usual, the followings are sentences I carefully dog-eared.

"Simplicity is the ultimate sophistication."

"Even though it faces the wall and nobody will ever see it, you'll know it's there, so you are going to use a beautiful piece of wood on the back. For you to sleep well at night, the aesthetic, the quality, has to be carried all the way through." (On the design of the back of the computer.)

"There's an old Hindu saying that goes, ' In the first 30 years of your life, you make your habits. For the last 30 years of your life, your habits make you.' Come help me celebrate mine." (On the invitation to his 30th birthday party in 1985.)

"People do judge the book by its cover." (On choosing the package of Macintosh.)

“He was incredibly phoney, a compete poseur....He pretended to be interested in technology, but he wasn't He was a marketing guy, and that is what marketing guys are: paid poseur.” (His opinion on Sculley, the chief marketing, but then he said to him :"I want you to work with me. I can learn so much from you." He knew how to pay to Sculley's ego and insecurities.)

When he was dating Joan Baez, a former lover of Bob Dylan, he thought a Ralph Lauren red dress was perfect for her. So he took her to see the dress, but didn't buy it for her. Yet he gave her computers, not the dress she couldn't afford.

"Steve believed it was our job to teach people aesthetics, to teach people what they should like...In our personal interactions, I couldn't abide his unkindness. I didn't want to hurt him, yet I didn't want to stand by and watch him hurt other people either." (His complicated long stretched relationship with his ex Redse. And she turned down his marriage proposal and broke up with him.)

"Jobs could be charming to people he hated just as easily as he could be insulting to people he liked."

"The older I get, the more I see how much motivations matter. The Zune was crappy because the people at Microsoft don't really love music or art the way we do. We won because we personally love music. We made the iPod for ourselves and when you 're doing something for yourself, or your best friend or family, you're not going to cheese out. If you don't love something, you're not going to go the extra mile, work the extra weekend, challenge the status quo as much." (On iPod's success.)

"'Simply handing over your iPod to a friend, your blind date, or the total stranger sitting next to you on the plane opens you up like a book.' All somebody needs to do is scroll through your library on that click wheel, and, musically speaking, you're nakend. It's not just what you like - it's who you are."

"I think honestly, when he is very frustrated, and his way to achieve catharsis is to hurt somebody. And I think he feels he has a liberty and a license to do that. The normal rules of social engagement, he feels, don't apply to him." (The design chief Ive analysed his earnest intensity.)

"At one point the pulmonologist tried to put a mask over his face when he was deeply sedated. Jobs ripped it off and mumbled that he hated the design and refused to wear it. Though barely able to speak, he ordered them to bring five different options for the mask and he would pick a design he liked."

"I'm disappointed in Obama...He's having trouble leading because he's reluctant to offend people or piss them off." (On his meeting with the president, he did not hold back.)

His great contribution in Toy Story and other pixar blockbusters, the great design of apple stores, the platform of apps, iCloud, Apple products and Apple itself.

Last but not the least, his letter to his wife Laurene Powell on their 20th anniversary, oh how I cried my Huanghe River tears:

We didn't know much about each other 20 years ago. We were guided by our intuition; you swept me off my feet. It was snowing when we got married at the Ahwahnee (Lodge in Yosemite). Years passed, kids came, good times, hard times, but never bad times. Our love and respect has endured and grown. We've been through so much together and here we are right back where we started 20 years ago - older, wiser - with wrinkles on our faces and hearts. We now know many of life's joys, sufferings, secrets and wonders and we're still here together. My feet have never returned to the ground.

A Classic Read Without Much Pleasure

2013-11-18

This is the second book of my all-native-but-me book club, and my peers loved the book so much they proposed to change the book club's name into ''orgy porgy", yea, who wouldn't love it? I bet the number of our dwindling male members will increasing if we put it out there!

Back to the book, while most of the book club members love the book so much, Jojo, the latest member loved it so much, she rated it 9 out of 10, I hesitated to put out my number, which is a big old 6. Sorry folks, it wasn't for me. I was about to give it 6, but given the circumstances: I read it in the middle of my GRE preparation, I literally need to squeeze time out for the book, flipping a couple of pages through lunch break, or during my commute. I even have to delete all the games in the iphone to make time for it. And then there is the exploration by the members, they vehemently share their thoughts on the precious childhood read (several of them regard it as the first and best exposure to literature.)

It is a unprecedented success on my part, an expression now I used often on surviving another hectic day filled with GRE vocab reciting. However,this is my first sci fi book, my first dystopian book and it has to count as something.

Two opposite worlds, one with all the efficiency, people are made out of tubes on a conveyor belt,mass production is popular, instant gratification, soma holiday, there is no parents discipline us, no god, no solitude,no one gets old, old one is faithful to anyone,even kids were playing sex game(which is shocking enough,but at least they are having sex with each other.) And then there is another world, people have feelings, they read Shakespeare, they grow old and they have babies in the most mammal way. Most of readers (The one I have a discussion with) were constantly battling between which world they love better.

I love how the book is ahead of time, the sci fi is published in 1932 and at that time, industrial revolution was just over, and people see Henry Ford as God(as oppose to Steve Jobs?) I can imagine how shocking readers at that time when they read the book filled with audacious plots on the main characters being promiscuous and parents being the dirty words.

But my inclination on the savage world was never for a mere moment faltered. In another word, Aldous Huxley never succeed in convincing me that the brave new world is appealing. I couldn't imagine living without solitude, or any rules, I highly doubt if I'd be happy at all. And how about reading? Even Aldous Huxley said so: Words can be like X-rays if you use them properly -- they’ll go through anything. You read and you’re pierced. But how can you get pierced without the solitude. I think if you are living in the world where there is always distractions, which sadly I think we are easily living in the mode, but what fun it is in that type of life? If you are born to be in a tube with your life and destiny decided by the staff in the center, what you are supposed to like or despise, all settled for you, is it really the best condition of living? Would you rather be a sad smart guy or a happy fool?

Another reason the book doesn't speak to me is the language, which is my initial thought. Sci fi is fraught with made-up words, which I agree, and in the beginning I couldn't follow the plots and I believe it's because of the language. But the fact that I can enjoy Juno Diaz's books which constantly interrupt by Spanish told me, this isn't about language at all. Readers got potentials, they are trained to take challenges in reading, and you add the condiment in and we generally grow with it. Eventually I set with the conclusion that Aldous' book is not gripping enough for me because of the mish-mash of inconstant plots and the stilte 1930s language.

Finally, the ultimate deep thought provoked by the book, where is the brave new world, is it anywhere to be found in real life? Sophia, another member of the club raised the question: Is China or America more like the brave new world? And some said: China! I listened patiently for them to lash out the reasons. Some are filthy rich, and they are above the rules, and they don't even have religions to regulate them. As a religious Chinese who see both side of the countries, I have to say, it might happen in China, or America, or anywhere in the world, but it can't be simplified as one country or even one region. There are people who think they are so privileged and above the law in every country, but just because they think they can get away with anything, they don't actually get away with anything. At some point, it will backfire.

To briefly summarize, the brave new world might be on every 100 books you have to read before you kick the bucket. But unless I'm stuck in a room with nothing but the book to keep me sane, I would't go back and read the whole thing again any time soon.

Still, hooray to my first sci fi classic.